Coping with shame: the role of self-reflective capacities in perceiving others as empathic

Georgia J. Bush; Andrew F. Luchner

doi:10.4081/ripppo.2025.824

Authors

Georgia J. Bush

gbush@rollins.edu

https://orcid.org/0009-0009-4222-6087

Department of Psychology, Rollins College, Florida, United States.

Andrew F. Luchner

https://orcid.org/0000-0002-0161-5336

Department of Psychology, Rollins College, Florida, United States.

Shame is a complex negative emotion and transdiagnostic feature of psychopathology in which one feels there is something inherently wrong with oneself due to a negative self-evaluation. However, there are self-reflective capacities, such as mentalized affectivity and self-reassurance, that assist us in managing the emotional and cognitive impact. Mentalized affectivity, a component of mentalization, is a complex form of emotion regulation that involves an interest and appreciation of the internal states of self and others through the lens of one’s past experiences. Similarly, self-criticism and self-reassurance are both processes in which one reflects and evaluates the self through either judgment or compassion. However, when mentalized affectivity and self-evaluation are maladaptive, individuals are subject to increased negative emotions and psychological distress. This study investigates how mentalized affectivity, self-criticism, and self-reassurance predict perceptions of empathy from others when faced with recall of shame-based experiences. Participants (N=246; 54.5% male) completed measures of mentalized affectivity, self-criticism, self-reassurance, and perceptions of empathy from others based on autobiographical memories of shame. Multiple regression revealed expressing emotions and self-reassurance as significant predictors of perceptions of empathy from others, suggesting how a combination of these forms of self-reflection may protect against the negative impact of shame. Our findings support the use of both mentalization-based and compassion-focused treatment to restore mentalization capacities and self-reassurance to reduce the impact of memories of shame.

Dimensions

Altmetric

PlumX Metrics

Downloads

Download data is not yet available.

Citations

Allen, J., Bleiberg, E., & Haslam-Hopwood, T. (2003). Mentalizing as a compass for treatment. Bulletin of the Menninger Clinic, 67, 1-11. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1521/bumc.67.1.5.23448

Barcaccia, B., Salvati, M., Pallini, S., Baiocco, R., Curcio, G., Mancini, F., & Vecchio, G. M. (2020). Interpersonal forgiveness and adolescent depression. The mediational role of self-reassurance and self-criticism. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 29(2), 462-470. doi: 10.1007/s10826-019-01550-1 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-019-01550-1

Baron-Cohen, S., & Wheelwright, S. (2004). The empathy quotient: An investigation of adults with Asperger syndrome or high functioning autism, and normal sex differences. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 34(2), 163-175. doi: 10.1023/b:jadd.0000022607.19833.00 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1023/B:JADD.0000022607.19833.00

Bateman, A., Fonagy, P., Campbell, C., Luyten, P., & Debbané, M. (2023). Cambridge guide to mentalization-based treatment (MBT). Cambridge University Press. doi: 10.1017/9781108896054 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1017/9781108896054

Benau, K. (2022). Shame, pride, and relational trauma: Concepts and psychotherapy. Routledge. doi: 10.4324/9780429425943 DOI: https://doi.org/10.4324/9780429425943

Blatt, S. J. (2008). Polarities of experience: Relatedness and self-definition in personality development, psychopathology, and the therapeutic process. American Psychological Association. doi: 10.1037/11749-000 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1037/11749-000

Bloom, P. (2017). Against empathy: The case for rational compassion. Random House.

Bush, G. J., & Luchner, A. F. (in press). The indirect effect of mentalized affectivity on the relationship between perceptions of narcissism in others and view of oneself. Journal of Emotion and Psychopathology.

Bynum, W. E., 4th, Artino, A. R. Jr., Uijtdehaage, S., Webb, A. M. B., & Varpio, L. (2019). Sentinel emotional events: The nature, triggers, and effects of shame experiences in medical residents. Academic Medicine: Journal of the Association of American Medical Colleges, 94(1), 85-93. doi: 10.1097/ACM.0000000000002479 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1097/ACM.0000000000002479

Cavalcanti, L. G., Steindl, S. R., Matos, M., & Boschen, M. J. (2021). Fears of compassion magnify the effects of rumination and worry on the relationship between self-criticism and depression. Current Psychology: A Journal for Diverse Perspectives on Diverse Psychological Issues. Advance online publication. doi: 10.1007/s12144-021-01510-3 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s12144-021-01510-3

Choi-Kain, L. W., & Gunderson, J. G. (2008). Mentalization: Ontogeny, assessment, and application in the treatment of borderline personality disorder. The American Journal of Psychiatry, 165(9), 1127-1135. doi: 10.1176/appi.ajp.200807081360 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.ajp.2008.07081360

Clark, M. S., Fitness, J., & Brissette, I. (2001). Understanding people’s perceptions of relationships is crucial to understanding their emotional lives. In G. Fletcher, & M. Clark (Eds.), Blackwell handbook of social psychology: Interpersonal processes (pp. 253-278). Blackwell Publishing. doi: 10.1002/9780470998557.ch10 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1002/9780470998557.ch10

Daros, A. R., & Ruocco, A. C. (2021). Which emotion regulation strategies are most associated with trait emotion dysregulation? A transdiagnostic examination. Journal of Psychopathology and Behavioral Assessment, 43(3), 478-490. doi: 10.1007/s10862-020-09864-x DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s10862-020-09864-x

DeYoung, P. A. (2015). Understanding and treating chronic shame: A relational/neurobiological approach. Routledge/Taylor & Francis Group. DOI: https://doi.org/10.4324/9781315734415

Fonagy, P., & Bateman, A. W. (2019). Introduction. In: Bateman, A., & Fonagy, P. (Eds.) Handbook of mentalizing in mental health practice. American Psychiatric Association Publishing, Inc. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.books.9781615379019

Fonagy, P., Gergely, G., Jurist, E. L., & Target, M. (2002). Affect regulation, mentalization, and the development of the self. Other press.

Gagliardini, G., Gullo, S., Caverzasi, E., Boldrini, A., Blasi, S., & Colli, A. (2018). Assessing mentalization in psychotherapy: First validation of the Mentalization Imbalances Scale. Research in Psychotherapy (Milano), 21(3), 339. doi: 10.4081/ripppo.2018.339 DOI: https://doi.org/10.4081/ripppo.2018.339

Gilbert, P. (2000). The relationship of shame, social anxiety and depression: The role of the evaluation of social rank. Clinical Psychology and Psychotherapy, 7(3), 174-189. doi: 10.1002/1099-0879(200007)7:3<174::AID-CPP236>3.0.CO;2-U DOI: https://doi.org/10.1002/1099-0879(200007)7:3<174::AID-CPP236>3.0.CO;2-U

Gilbert, P. (2011). Shame in psychotherapy and the role of compassion focused therapy. In R. L. Dearing & J. P. Tangney (Eds.), Shame in the therapy hour (pp. 325-354). American Psychological Association. doi: 10.1037/12326-014 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1037/12326-014

Gilbert, P., & Andrews, B. (Eds.). (1998). Shame: Interpersonal behavior, psychopathology, and culture. Oxford University Press. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1093/oso/9780195114799.001.0001

Gilbert, P., Clarke, M., Hempel, S., Miles, J. N., & Irons, C. (2004). Criticizing and reassuring oneself: An exploration of forms, styles and reasons in female students. The British Journal of Clinical Psychology, 43(Pt 1), 31-50. doi: 10.1348/014466504772812959 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1348/014466504772812959

Gilbert, P., & Irons, C. (2008). Shame, self-criticism, and self-compassion in adolescence. In N. B. Allen & L. B. Sheeber (Eds.), Adolescent emotional development and the emergence of depressive disorders (pp. 195-214). Cambridge: Cambridge University Press. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1017/CBO9780511551963.011

Gilbert, P., & Procter, S. (2006). Compassionate mind training for people with high shame and self-criticism: Overview and pilot study of a group therapy approach. Clinical Psychology and Psychotherapy, 13(6), 353-379. doi: 10.1002/cpp.507 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1002/cpp.507

Gilbert, P., & Simos, G. (Eds.). (2022). Compassion focused therapy: Clinical practice and applications. Routledge. doi: 10.4342/9781003035879 DOI: https://doi.org/10.4324/9781003035879

Greenberg, D. M., Rudenstine, S., Alaluf, R., & Jurist, E. L. (2021). Development and validation of the Brief-Mentalized Affectivity Scale: Evidence from cross-sectional online data and an urban community-based mental health clinic. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 77(11), 2638-2652. doi: 10.1002/jclp.23203 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1002/jclp.23203

Greenberg, D. M., Kolasi, J., Hegsted, C. P., Berkowitz, Y., & Jurist, E. L. (2017). Mentalized affectivity: A new model and assessment of emotion regulation. PloS one, 12(10), e0185264. doi: 10.1371/journal.pone.0185264 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0185264

Greenberg, L. S. (2024). Shame and anger in psychotherapy. American Psychological Association. doi: 10.1037/0000393-000 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1037/0000393-000

Halamová, J., Kanovský, M., Gilbert, P., Troop, N. A., Zuroff, D. C., Hermanto, N., Petrocchi, N., Sommers-Spijkerman, M., Kirby, J. N., Shahar, B., Krieger, T., Matos, M., Asano, K., Yu, F., Basran, J., & Kupeli, N. (2018). The factor structure of the forms of self-criticizing/attacking & self-reassuring scale in thirteen distinct populations. Journal of Psychopathology and Behavioral Assessment, 40(4), 736-751. doi: 10.1007/s10862-018-9686-2 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s10862-018-9686-2

Harman, R., & Lee, D. (2010). The role of shame and self-critical thinking in the development and maintenance of current threat in post-traumatic stress disorder. Clinical Psychology & Psychotherapy, 17(1), 13-24. doi: 10.1002/cpp.636 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1002/cpp.636

Hermanto, N., & Zuroff, D. C. (2016). The social mentality theory of self-compassion and self-reassurance: The interactive effect of care-seeking and caregiving. The Journal of Social Psychology, 156(5), 523-535. doi: 10.1080/00224545.2015.1135779 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1080/00224545.2015.1135779

Hermanto, N., Zuroff, D. C., & Leybman, M. J. (2017). Receiving support, giving support, and self-reassurance: A daily diary test of social mentality theory. Personality and Individual Differences, 107, 37-42. doi: 10.1016/j.paid.2016.11.013 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2016.11.013

Jain, F. A., & Fonagy, P. (2020). Mentalizing imagery therapy: Theory and case series of imagery and mindfulness techniques to understand self and others. Mindfulness, 11(1), 153-165. doi: 10.1007/s12671-018-0969-1 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s12671-018-0969-1

Jordan, J. V. (1997). Relational development through mutual empathy. In A. C. Bohart & L. S. Greenberg (Eds.), Empathy reconsidered: New directions in psychotherapy (pp. 343-351). American Psychological Association. doi: 10.1037/10226-015 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1037/10226-015

Jurist, E. (2018). Minding emotions: Cultivating mentalization in psychotherapy. Guilford Press.

Jurist, E. L. (2005). Mentalized affectivity. Psychoanalytic Psychology, 22(3), 426-444. doi: 10.1037/0736-9735.22.3.426 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1037/0736-9735.22.3.426

Jurist, E., Greenberg, D., Pizziferro, M., Alaluf, R., & Sosa, M. P. (2023). Virtue, well-being, and mentalized affectivity. Research in Psychotherapy (Milano), 26(3), 710. doi: 10.4081/ripppo.2023.710 DOI: https://doi.org/10.4081/ripppo.2023.710

Jurist, E., & Sosa, M. P. (2019). Commentary on mentalization and culture. Clinical Psychology: Science and Practice, 26(4). doi: 10.1111/cpsp.12302 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1111/cpsp.12302

Kenny, D. A., (2019). Interpersonal perception: The foundation of social relationships. Guilford Press.

Kimmes, J. G., Edwards, A. B., Wetchler, J. L., & Bercik, J. (2014). Self and other ratings of dyadic empathy as predictors of relationship satisfaction. American Journal of Family Therapy, 42(5), 426-437. doi: 10.1080/01926187.2014.925374 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1080/01926187.2014.925374

Lyu, D., Liu, Q., Pan, Y., Wang, A., Pei, G., & Jin, J. (2022). The different role of trait empathy and state social exclusion empathy on subsequent feelings about gambling outcome: Evidence from event-related potentials and time frequency decompositions. Neuropsychologia, 176, 108369. doi: 10.1016/j.neuropsychologia.2022.108369 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1016/j.neuropsychologia.2022.108369

Marschall, D. E. (1996). Effects of induced shame on subsequent empathy and altruistic behavior. George Mason University.

Millard, L. A., Wan, M. W., Smith, D. M., & Wittkowski, A. (2023). The effectiveness of compassion focused therapy with clinical populations: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Journal of Affective Disorders, 326, 168-192. doi: 10.1016/j.jad.2023.01.010 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jad.2023.01.010

Neff, K. D., Rude, S. S., & Kirkpatrick, K. L. (2007). An examination of self-compassion in relation to positive psychological functioning and personality traits. Journal of Research in Personality, 41(4), 908-916. doi: 10.1016/j.jrp.2006.08.002 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jrp.2006.08.002

Parker, S., & Thomas, R. (2009). Psychological differences in shame vs. guilt: Implications for mental health counselors. Journal of Mental Health Counseling, 31(3), 213-224. doi: 10.17744/mehc.31.3.f405217281988832 DOI: https://doi.org/10.17744/mehc.31.3.f405217281988832

Petrocchi, N., Dentale, F., & Gilbert, P. (2019). Self-reassurance, not self-esteem, serves as a buffer between self-criticism and depressive symptoms. Psychology and Psychotherapy, 92(3), 394-406. doi: 10.1111/papt.12186 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1111/papt.12186

Sedighimornani, N. (2018). Shame and its features: Understanding of shame. European Journal of Social Sciences Studies, 3, 3. doi: 10.5281/zenodo.1453426

Sharp, C., & Bevington, D. (2023). Mentalizing in psychotherapy: A guide for practitioners. Guildford Press.

Sheikh, S., & Janoff-Bulman, R. (2010). The “should” and “should nots” of moral emotions: A self-regulatory perspective on shame and guilt. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 36(2), 213-224. doi: 10.1177/0146167209356788 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167209356788

Shen, L. (2010). On a scale of state empathy during message processing. Western Journal of Communication, 74(5), 504-524. doi: 10.1080/10570314.2010.612278 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1080/10570314.2010.512278

Sommers-Spijkerman, M., Tropetter, H., Schreurs, K., & Bohlmeijer, E. (2018). Pathways to improving mental health in compassion-focused therapy: Self-reassurance, self-criticism and affect as mediators of change. Frontiers in Psychology, 9, 2442. doi: 10.3389/fpsyg.2018.02442 DOI: https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2018.02442

Song, Y., Nie, T., Shi, W., Zhao, X., & Yang, Y. (2019). Empathy impairment in individuals with autism spectrum conditions from a multidimensional perspective: A meta-analysis. Frontiers in Psychology, 10, 1902. doi: 10.3389/fpsyg.2019.01902 DOI: https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2019.01902

Svenaeus, F. (2015). The relationship between empathy and sympathy in good health care. Medicine, Health Care, and Philosophy, 18(2), 267-277. doi: 10.1007/s11019-014-9601-x DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s11019-014-9601-x

Tangney, J. P. (1991). Moral affect: The good, the bad, and the ugly. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 61(4), 598-607. doi: 10.1037/0022-3514.61.4.598 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1037//0022-3514.61.4.598

Tangney, J. P. (1996). Conceptual and methodological issues in the assessment of shame and guilt. Behavior Research and Therapy, 34(9), 741-754. doi: 10.1016/0005-7967(96)00034-4 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1016/0005-7967(96)00034-4

Tangney, J. & Dearing, R. (2002). Shame and guilt. New York: Guilford Publications.

Terrizzi Jr, J. A., & Shook, N. J. (2020). On the origin of shame: Does shame emerge from an evolved disease-avoidance architecture?. Frontiers in Behavioral Neuroscience, 14, 19. doi: 10.3389/fnbeh.2020.00019 DOI: https://doi.org/10.3389/fnbeh.2020.00019

Thompson, R. J. & Berenbaum, H. (2006). Shame reactions to everyday dilemmas are associated with depressive disorder. Cognitive Therapy and Research, 30(4), 415-425. doi: 10.1007/s10608-006-9056-3 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s10608-006-9056-3

Trommsdorff, G., & Rothbaum, F. (2008). Development of emotion regulation in cultural context. In M. Vandekerckhove, C. von Scheve, S. Ismer, S. Jung, & S. Kronast (Eds.), Regulating emotions: Culture, social necessity, and biological inheritance (pp. 85-120). Blackwell Publishing. doi: 10.1002/9781444301786.ch4 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1002/9781444301786.ch4

Vinayak, S., & Judge, J. (2018). Resilience and empathy as predictors of psychological wellbeing among adolescents. International Journal of Health Sciences and Research, 8(4), 192-200.

Wood, D., Harms, P., & Vazire, S. (2010). Perceiver effects as projective tests: What your perceptions of others say about you. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 99(1), 174-190. doi: 10.1037/a0019390 DOI: https://doi.org/10.1037/a0019390

Supporting Agencies

Rollins College Student-Faculty Collaborative Scholarship Program

How to Cite

Bush, G. J., & Luchner, A. F. (2025). Coping with shame: the role of self-reflective capacities in perceiving others as empathic. Research in Psychotherapy: Psychopathology, Process and Outcome. https://doi.org/10.4081/ripppo.2025.824

Download Citation

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 4.0 International License.

PAGEPress has chosen to apply the Creative Commons Attribution NonCommercial 4.0 International License (CC BY-NC 4.0) to all manuscripts to be published.